CHAPTER FIVE

FALLING IN LOVE

My brother Johannes was living in an intentional community in Northern Ireland that was part of a Biodynamic farm and I decided to join him there. The transition from four years of isolated farms and agricultural school to a very intense community of two hundred people was difficult for me. Glencraig, as the community is called, is part of the world wide Camphill Movement that works with people with developmental disabilities. It is a magical property with a small herd of dairy cows and extensive gardens and sits right on the Belfast Loch. The work on the farm was tailored to the needs of the developmentally disabled and we tried to keep the work place simple and people friendly. At that time, we milked six to eight cows by hand and there was always lots of shovel and wheelbarrow work for those who could do it. On the other hand, we did have tractors and equipment to do the heavy work such as hay-making.
Glencraig also had a school for children with developmental disabilities and a three-year training course for the coworkers. The way that Camphill works is that everybody is a volunteer with no pay, and we all shared our lives with the disabled. All our financial needs were taken care of, including vacations, and I felt good about this arrangement
It was at Glencraig that I experienced that the care of the land is a community activity and not something that was the sole responsibility of the farmer. Every Sunday morning we had a land group meeting which many of the community members attended. The farmers would give a report of the week’s activity and future projects. As the community tried to be self-sufficient in food, the house mothers were always interested in the vegetables and other produce such as the number of gallons of milk they would receive that week sometimes the farmers would have complaints. One time the cows got out because somebody left a gate open, and consequently the veggies got trampled. Long range needs were also discussed and how these fitted into the resources of the community. Questions always arose such as whether it was really necessary to get a new tractor and, if yes, how the community could pay for it.
What spoke to me most strongly at Glencraig was the spiritual foundation of the community. Every morning after breakfast, each household would gather and read a passage from the bible. Then, on Saturday evening, the houses would hold a bible evening that was based on the last supper. We would sit in silence for twenty minutes and then a candle would be lit and we would move to the dining table and share a simple meal of bread and salt and a glass of grape juice. While eating, the conversation would revolve around special experiences that people had during the week and steer away from day-to-day troubles. Then the table would be cleared and the bible read. The person reading would lead the conversation but everybody could join in. Reading the bible every morning and then joining in communion with the other members once a week was central to the community and gave it cohesion.
The festivals were also celebrated, with artistic activities such as drama productions based on the spiritual aspect of the festival. There were also opportunities to be part of a study group, when one of Rudolf Steiner’s books would be read and often on a Sunday evening there would be a lecture by one of the community leaders. I loved the spiritual aspect of the community, but after six months of this intense living I was burned out. I was still struggling with feeling comfortable with people. I must have been shy because people would make jokes like, “Walter said three words today!” As far as I was concerned I was lying low, seeing how everything worked after having been alone on farms for so long. For one thing, there were more young women than men and I was definitely being checked out. The previous three years had been very lonely and I was a little over-whelmed by all the people and community activities. In the evenings, the young co workers were expected to lead activities with the handicapped adults and I found myself supervising sessions at the heated swimming pool with one of the women coworkers. Joan had a cute bikini and shinning dark eyes and I fell for her. She lived two houses down the drive and I noticed that every Sunday at about two she posted her letters back home. I would give her a few minutes head start and then saunter out and accidently bump into her. She was much more astute then me. Years later she told me that she knew that we would get married the first time she saw me.
Part of my troubles at Glencraig stemmed from the fact that I was exhausted. Being young and in love, Joan and I would chat and make out till twelve or one in the morning and then go to sleep. It was summer time and Northern Ireland, being so far north starts to get light soon after three. I would wake up and wait for six to roll around, so I could go milk the cows. Paul the other farmer had a wife with a baby that cried all night so he didn’t bother coming to milking on a regular basis. Milking eight cows by hand by myself before breakfast with too little sleep didn’t start the day right. After six months, I needed a change and I applied to Emerson College an Anthroposophical school, in Sussex, England where I was accepted.
Being a student was wonderful as I had little responsibility. After Glencraig, where everything was so intense, it was necessary for me to stand back and take in everything I had experienced. I missed Joan terribly but she was upset with me for leaving Glencraig and doing my own thing. She decided to go back to the States and get her Masters degree in Waldorf Education.
At Emerson, I could be as engaged with the other students as much or as little as I wanted. The school is based on the work of Rudolf Steiner and offered a foundation year of Anthroposophical studies which could lead into a second year of specialization. No credits or grades were offered so it was totally a self-enrichment program. The mornings were more intellectual, with lectures and study groups and the rest of the day would involve activities like arts and crafts and wood work. If life got too intense, I had my favorite spot in the library where I could read or I would play hooky and go for three-hour walks in the Ashdown Forest.
Meanwhile, back in the States, Joan decided that she would take a teaching position in South East Pennsylvania at Kimberton Waldorf School. This was tough for me as I didn’t have any interest in moving to the States. However, Joan’s parents offered me a job painting their house so I spent the summer on Long Island, painting. By the end of the summer we decided we would get married and we moved down to Pennsylvania. The Waldorf School had a five- hundred-acre farm attached to it but it was still being farmed conventionally with the old farm manager. However, across the river, a new Camphill community with three hundred and fifty acres of land had just been started. This land was going to be farmed Biodynamically and I moved there to help in the farming operation. All this land had been the estate of Mr. Maryn, the founder of Sunoco Oil. Mr. Maryn was a follower of Rudolf Steiner and helped found Kimberton Waldorf School and after his death the rest of the estate was gifted to Camphill.
I was twenty four when we married. The wedding service was in the old ballroom of the mansion. As the priest walked into the room I experienced a moment of confusion and the veils’ to the spiritual world fell away. The room was crowded with our friends and community members, but all around and filling the space above and around us there were spiritual beings looking on, and celebrating our sacrament of marriage. I felt that our vows were witnessed by both our friends and spiritual beings. It was a reminder that our world is not so separate from the spiritual world and that what we do is important on many levels.
Joan and I spent our next four years in Camphill, Kimberton. She taught at the Kimberton Waldorf School and commuted back and forth. She really was an excellent teacher; she put her heart and soul into it and was loved by her students. Being part of two intense communities was not easy and we realized that eventually we would leave. A Waldorf school asks for a time commitment from the teacher as she moves with her class through the grades. When fourth grade finished we started looking for our own farm. Meanwhile I had a wonderful opportunity to take over the management of the farm and start the conversion to Biodynamic farm practices. I not only learned about running a farm but also about living in an intentional community. We milked about forty cows and farmed three hundred acres. By the end, there were four coworkers and three mentally handicapped people on the farm. There were too many people for me, but that was part of the work of Camphill and community living. In addition I really wanted to find out if I could farm on my own without the support of a community.
When the school year finished, we packed up and started looking for our farm. We were both twenty-eight and ready to find out what we could do on our own.